|It Ain't All Chains and Pains, with Master Jim|
It Ain't All Chains and Pains, with Master Jim
It was very fitting that the very first meeting of the new millennium, belonged to Master Jim, a spiritual man, who has contributed so much to the leather community and TES in the past 17 years. Master Jim began the meeting by giving everyone a little bio about himself. He described himself as a Daddy, take-charge lover, shaman, mentor, sexual healer, world-traveler, lover of gourmet eroticism, and women who say yes - Master Jim practices BDSM on a level that very few do. He believes that toys are secondary, and the thing that matters the most is the path of Eros that one walks experiencing this lifestyle.
Master Jim encompasses all these traits and more. His accomplishments, attained lifestyle is inspiring to all of us who grasp this scene as our lives. The man is a real time dominant/master on the East Coast BDSM scene for the past 20 years. In addition, he is the founder and leader of the popular Dominant Men/Submissive Women's Group at TES, as well as a TES Emeritus Board Member.
Having very artfully conveyed his credentials for speaking, he continued to discuss the training of a submissive. Even the littlest things can be used as means to controlling a submissive. One such example he gave:
"A dominant telling his submissive on the phone, "I want you to cut a piece of your pussy hair. When you cut it off, I want you to know and feel who is doing this for you. When you look at that bald spot, I want it to be a reminder, who you did this for."
He went on to discuss when it is practiced on the spiritual level, there's nothing like it. It's not about pain or pleasure, but about the metaphysical chemistry that takes place within oneself.
He then proceeded to give another example:
"As the sub is blindfolded, she hears her master using a bell to lead her. She tunes in every single one of her existing senses to the sound of that bell. She trusts her Master completely knowing that he will lead her but not harm her. She does not need to know where she is going, but just to trust she is being lead."
Master Jim then alluded to the physical aspect of S&M. He stated, "The physical part is easy to pick up". "You can go to workshops, and learn how to use the floggers, the canes, the paddles, etc". "However you may not know as a dominant how the submissive feels when you see these toys, but you will know how to use them."
He then added, "the thing that separates good dominants from the so-so dominants, are the ones who are able to play on that spiritual level." He feels one of the problems is that many dominants do not ever go to and practice at these levels.
Master Jim maintains that the most intense, satisfying applications of BDSM for both the participants should not just involve physical pain, but also the emotional and psychological aspects that touch the soul. In addition, he believes many masters do not understand that one of their functions is to give women who want to be submissive, permission to pursue their submissive side.
One of the more thought provoking questions asked by someone in the crowd was:
"We already know what the submissive gets from the scene, but what does the dominant get from it?"
Master Jim answered:
"He gets a rush of power knowing that he has been given that control and total trust from his partner. One cannot experience that in the mainstream world."
This meeting was extremely educational and thought provoking in a sense that we saw a topic which is so often forgotten, yet is one of the most important aspects of the entire S&M world, and that is, "The Spirituality"